A Better Life, thanks to help from SamaraCare
I waited a long time to start counseling. I thought, men don’t get counseling, counseling is a big waste of my time and there’s surely no benefit to talking about the past. After all, hurt feelings are just a sign of weakness. I had to unlearn these mistaken ideas.
My story is that I lived my whole life of 60+ years in my head. It felt like I locked my feelings in a box as soon as possible and then I didn’t open that box. This started during my childhood when my mother said, “you’re too sensitive”, after I shared some hurt feelings with her. My thoughts countered, “she doesn’t like your feelings. You’re going to get kicked out of this family. What are you going to do? Where are you going to go?”. I finally reached a point where I knew that living in my head and my life-long ways of managing my feelings weren’t working
In the beginning, I asked my SamaraCare counselor
“Can you help me integrate my thoughts and feelings?”
He said, “Yes, I can help. And, what do you think about doing that?”
I answered, “I’m not sure, I’ll have to let you know later.”
It took some time, but I established trust in my counseling relationship. Then we slowly began the process of opening some of those boxes and doing the often painful but healing work of processing what was there, what had been stuffed away so long ago. Each week I believe I made a little progress toward the goal of integrating my thoughts and feelings. This took a while and there were certainly moments when I contemplated quitting counseling because of how painful the things were that we were addressing. I considered putting everything neatly back into their boxes, but I stuck with it which took some courage and faith.
My counseling offered me a safe place to heal wounds from my past, talk about present day relation- ship challenges, and find hope for the future. I needed someone to walk with me and my SamaraCare counselor provided that.
I now have the answer to my counselor’s question that will endure: it is worth it! Thanks to help from SamaraCare, I have a better life. I couldn’t be more thankful, I am happier, and my faith is stronger. While I still have my ups and downs, I feel like I’m living more of the life I was meant to live.
Did I wait too long to start counseling?
Two of my favorite questions and answers are:
1. When is the best time to plant a tree? 20 years ago
2. When is the second best time? Today
Are you ready to plant your tree today and make a better life?
Whatever your age and circumstances, SamaraCare can help.
